31.12.09

The Chaos Theory

For me, 2009 will never be forgotten.
This was the year I turned 30.
And this was the year I made up for a lot of growing up.

What a mind fucking mixed bag of a year.
I faced the most difficult professional crisis of my life, dealing with assholes of great magnitude, fighting liars, cheats and people with a capacity for malice I never knew existed. I saw the human value system touch a new low and I felt the thinnest part of a largely false moral fabric.

And I was in love.
Which honestly made all the aforesaid seem less than insignificant.

Then the work life got worse. And I had to quit, with scars of the umbilical cords that brought me there in the first place.

I started work at a new place. Started all over again.

And somewhere during this time, I lost my sense of love. Because I had spent too much of it on those who couldn’t return it. Or value it.

The year ended with a final nail in the coffin that convinced me this was the year of retribution for everyone I had ever hurt in my life. Because with each ache I felt, I saw their faces flash before my eyes. And I could do nothing but say ‘I’m sorry’.

But then, that is not all.

This year also gave me something I will treasure forever; over and above the harsh lessons that came my way.

This year, I made friends who became family (Kiran, Priya, Tanmay, Amit). My family came closer to me after we fought (Anuja, Simran, Anisha). And my ex boss became my anchor and teacher (Ramanuj). My current boss rocks (Rahul) simply because he lets me be and do my thing, and kissing ass is not part of my KRA. And a whole bunch of wonderful friends, who made me not only tide through but deal with all the mayhem the year threw up. All of them put together, it feels like the armour of God.

So yeah, Fuck You 2009. And Fuck all the assholes you sent my way.

I won :)

11 comments:

ChiciLata said...

:) You won.

At least this year did not ultimately surprise us. :)

Ramit said...

Hope you always win dude! HNY 2010!

Raam said...

Dude I had similar feelings and guess what I had put my status message "says he will not think of past 'Decayed'. But, the next Decade is gonna be fresh and all his and only his!!!"

But true my friend.... How i only wish i could put all my thoughts so beautifully in words.

Have a great year and the year after and the year after :) ENJAY MAADI BROTHER!!!!

Queenmatrai said...

I love the attitude :)

Amit said...

I likes it..by the way..you are a true winner...that's for sure..keep on kicking ass and keep on making us smile..whatever you feel for us, we feel the same for you ! / amit mehra

Ramit said...

And I hope next year brings us your blog with a bigger font size!

Sorry, but my eyes aren't what they used to be now!

Austy said...

That's what's wrong with powerful writing. You can go ahead and convince people of just about anything.

Waqt tha. Achcha tha, bura tha, jaisa bhi tha, aapka tha. Pallu mat jhaado.

Jo zindagi ke 29 saal nahin sikha paaye, voh is ek saal ne sikha diya. Jeet toh gaye ho, par award dene vaale ko gaali mat do.

indianhomemaker said...

That was a tough year :( Hats off to you for making it a year of learning and discovering good people, (and winning against some bad ones)... best wishes for the year 2010!!! :)

haathi said...

well said. awesome energy after all that! id be a dead beat up duck by now, if i were you..

hats off, HK!

cinnamon said...

hahahhahhahahhahah... puchchi.

UjSen said...

And there i was thinking only I had a trashy 2009.